Being a parent can bring with it a rollercoaster of feelings – from happiness and love to worry and fear and back again. It’s anything but stress-free!
Stress happens to everyone and is a normal human reaction. A small amount of stress can even be useful in our daily lives – it helps us to focus and be productive. But stress can be harmful when it gets too much or goes on for too long, leading to exhaustion and burnout.
Many of life’s demands can cause stress, like work, relationships and juggling being a parent. When you feel stressed, it can get in the way of dealing with these demands and can affect everything you do. You can begin to feel stressed with even the simplest of tasks.
The first step to reducing stress? Try to be kind to yourself. Recognize that parenting is hard and there’s no such thing as a “perfect” parent. Taking time for yourself isn’t a luxury, it’s a necessity. When we take care of ourselves, we can better take care of our children as well.
Recognize the signs of stress
We can’t avoid stress completely, but there are ways to stop it from becoming overwhelming. Stress affects people in different ways. Feeling overwhelmed, increased anxiety, irritability, and fatigue are some of the effects that people experience.
Try to recognize the signs that you need a break and take steps to stop stress before it builds up – a short walk, a cup of tea or a breathing exercise can really make a difference. By doing so, you’re helping bring your body back into balance and preventing stress from building up, which can lead to burnout.
What to do if you get angry
If you ever feel yourself getting angry, step away and take 20 seconds to cool down. Breathe in and out slowly 5 times before you speak or move. If you can, go somewhere else for 5-10 minutes to regain control of your emotions.
What is burnout?
One of the negative consequences of accumulated stress is burnout. Burnout is a state of physical, emotional and mental exhaustion that results from prolonged exposure to stressors or situations that are emotionally demanding. It is emotional exhaustion.
Burnout includes many symptoms that can be both physical and emotional, such as:
- Feeling tired most of the time
- Difficulty sleeping or sleeping too much
- Reduced performance
- Concentration and memory problems
- Inability to make decisions
- Muscle tension
- Getting sick more often, frequent headache or upset stomach
- Restlessness
- Loss of empathy
If you relate to any of these symptoms, it could be a sign that you may be on the verge of burning out or being burned out. It is a sign that it’s time to pause, seek support from those around you, and focus on self-care. If you feel that you need further support, do not hesitate to reach out to a professional who can help you to prioritize self-care and explore how to manage stress.
Relaxation techniques for parents
Your breathing affects your whole body. When you feel stressed or worried, your body can become tense and your breathing speeds up. You can use breathing techniques to help you calm down. It can be very helpful to spend two to three minutes breathing deeply a couple of times a day to help you feel calm.
Deep breathing
Try to breathe in slowly and deeply to fill your lungs with air. Then breathe out slowly and fully. You can count to five on each inhale and exhale to help you breathe slowly. Try practicing this for two to three minutes. If you are doing this with your children, explain that when they inhale, they are blowing up their tummy softly like a balloon, and when they exhale the air is going slowly out of the balloon again.
Listen to your breath
It can be helpful to listen to your breath as the air goes in and out. You can put a hand on your stomach and feel it rise and fall with each breath. Listen to your breath for a while.
Add gentle movement
Drop your hands below your waist and keep your palms facing up. Slowly raise your hands as you breathe in through your nose. Stop when your hands are about shoulder level. Slowly lower your hands as you breathe out through your mouth.
The importance of self-care
Self-care is any activity that we do intentionally in order to take care of our mental, emotional and physical health. Although it’s a simple concept, it’s something we can often overlook.
Good self-care is key to an improved mood and reduced anxiety. A self-care activity can be as simple as taking the time to enjoy a cup of tea, listen to your favourite music or go outside for a walk. Think about some simple activities that re-energize you.
Self-care needs to be something you actively plan, rather than something that just happens. Add certain activities to your calendar, announce your plans to others in order to increase your commitment, and actively look for opportunities to practice self-care. See if you can incorporate self-care activities into your day with the support of those around you.
